Archive for September, 2007

Sad Day

Posted in Uncategorized on September 28, 2007 by Brandon

Looks like Super Smash Brothers Brawl for the Wii won’t hit until December 3. Ah well. At least it’ll give me more time to save up for the Wii and some controllers. Here’s hoping. I might get the Wii next week, depending on large my paycheck is. We shall see.


“And from that day on, he was as one dead.” – Jack Black, King Kong

Posted in Old Movie Review on September 28, 2007 by Brandon

And here’s a new old movie review! Hope y’all enjoy!

King Kong (Then:9.9/10; Now: 9/10)

*Possible Spoiler Alert* I’ll do my best to not give away too much about this movie, but there may be one or two things I’ll mention that one might not want to find out before watching the movie.

If Narnia was wonderful, then King Kong is magnificent. This movie surpasses every other movie I’ve seen this year. I’m giving it a stellar 9.9 out of 10. Obviously it is not a perfect movie, and though there are some flaws in it, they are virtually eclipsed by the fact that the rest of the movie is so beautiful.

King Kong is everything we ever wanted from the movies. Excitement. Pure escapism. Action adventure. A beautiful, tender love story. Excellent acting on all sides. Mind-boggling special effects. Simply put, this movie is about as close to perfection as I have ever seen Hollywood come, even coming close to the untouchable Lord of the Rings series. King Kong engages us with a captivating storyline that is enhanced by finely tuned, beautifully nuanced acting, on all sides. It tells the story of how one filmmaker journeys to Skull Island in an attempt to make a movie. There he finds the legendary King Kong, and a host of other troubles as well.

Jack Black plays the filmmaker, and though I have never seen him in a serious role, and found it hard to take him seriously, until I saw the movie, where he plays his character to perfection. Adrien Brody as the kidnapped Jack Driscoll also plays his part wonderfully, with amazing chemistry with Naomi Watts, who is also a wonderful part of the movie. The best part, though, is the chemistry between King Kong and Watts. King Kong looks so real I had a hard time telling he wasn’t real. His eyes, his mouth….everything about him just screamed, “THIS IS A REAL 25 FOOT TALL GORILLA!” And though it is a small detail, I have never seen Hollywood CGI creatures eat the right way. Even Gollum, when he is eating fish…there is something slightly fake about it. But when Kong is munching on a bamboo stick I could have sworn they were both actually there. Kong’s facial expressions are breathtaking as well. It is amazing how he is able to go from humorous to terrifying in a few short moments.

The best part of the movie, though, is the story between Kong and Naomi Watts. The premise is ridiculous…Watts and Kong fall in love. But the filmmakers manage to pull it off in a beautiful way with wonderful acting both from Kong and from Watts. Even Watt’s chemistry with Adrien Brody doesn’t come close to her chemistry with Kong. It is simply beautiful…and Kong is completely believable as the ape who goes ape over a girl.

King Kong is a beautiful, magnificent, majestic movie. 9.9/10. The only places where it goes wrong is in its slow buildup to the arrival on the island, and the occasional fake-looking brief half a second to a second long special effects shot. However, I appreciated that they did not rush to the island for the amazing special effects, as other filmmakers *cough*Lucas*cough* would have done. I also appreciated the fact that they worked extensively with miniatures, and not with extensive CGI, as some filmmakers *cough*Lucas*cough* would have done. Go see King Kong, okay? The special effects are amazing, the story is wonderful, and the gorilla is almost human. All in all a perfect movie to close off 2005, and undoubtedly one that will stand as a monument of great filmmaking in cinema history for years to come.

“You will try to spell his name correctly this time, won’t you?” – Hot Fuzz

Posted in Movie Buzz on September 27, 2007 by Brandon

Greetings, citizens! I have a very large amount of updates for you today, and I apologize for the wait, but I’ve been getting up my youtube videos, which I’ll give the link to later. Before that, though, some buzz!

First there’s this juicy little tidbit about the hottest of hot (or at least Hollywood would like us to believe) Jessica Biel possibly playing Wonder Woman in the upcoming Justice League of America. I have to admit, though, she seems absolutely perfect for the role, and it would be fantastic to see all of our heroes together in one movie, which has never happened before.

And THIS just seems stupid. A Terminator movie without Ah-nold? You’ve gotta be kidding me. And a full-on trilogy? No way. I predict massive money will be spent on the first film only to have it flop in theaters and have the rest of the series cut off at the knees. I certainly hope they don’t make three of them. Unless they get fantastic reviews, I am not going to see it. It would be like Die Hard without John McClane (Bruce Willis), The Bourne films without Bourne (Matt Damon.) How many times in movie history has a different actor replaced an old one with much success? Last time I counted, it was close to zero.

And finally some real buzz on the upcoming X-Files movie. The original was a fantastical movie experience, the perfect example of how you make a successful movie from a TV show. Hopefully they’ll bring back all the old cast and crew and make this new one just as good.

And this looks kinda fun. A Mummy 3. The Scorpion King was horrible attempt to imitate the wonderful tongue-in-cheek fun of the first two films. Nobody can compare with Brendan Fraser in this department. And, thankfully, they still have Brendan Fraser on board, it looks like. Not Rachel Weisz, though. Eh, I’m not too sad. Maria Bello replaces her, and she’s a great actress. I love Weisz as an actress, but she was never too terribly impressive in the Mummy films. Oh, and yeah. Sweet. A Terra Cotta Army. Awesome.

And Transformers 2 is finally official for Summer 2009. With Monsters and Aliens and Avatar scheduled for that same release date, this’ll be a fun summer at the movies. If you’ll look at the end, though, this delays Keanu Reeves’s The Day The Earth Stood Still, which kinda makes me pissed. Oh well.

And finally some Trek casting buzz. Somebody’s finally been (maybe) chosen to play Kirk. Mike Vogel. It’s just a rumor at this point, but he is in Cloverfield, which Abrams is producing, so I don’t know. It’s very possible, in any case. I don’t know if I like his looks, but you’ve got to admit, he looks a hell of a lot like young Kirk way back in the day. Oh well. Here’s hoping Abrams has got the magic touch.

And finally, the biggest news of the day, my youtube blog is up! It’s!!! Please go watch and comment! I will be posting up all the reviews I’ve done on here, so that, eventually, all my reviews I’ve ever written will be both available on here and on youtube. I hope you guys like it, enjoy!! Now, I must go to homework. Ta ta for now, people.

Bonafide Bond Buzz

Posted in Movie Buzz on September 22, 2007 by Brandon

Check this out. Apparently the reports from Daniel Craig that this upcoming Bond flick would be all campy and cheesy like the Bonds of yore was false. Well, I know I’m breathing a sigh of relief. I wouldn’t want them to take precisely what made Casino Royale so enjoyable and then squander it on a sequel. But then again, maybe this is just a script writer dodging questions and giving false leads, and if it isn’t, maybe Craig was purposefully giving false leads, or maybe he thought it was gonna be all campy but it’s actually not. Ah well. We’ll just have to wait and see, won’t we?

Prince Caspian!!

Posted in Movie Buzz on September 18, 2007 by Brandon

Well, here’s the first official Prince Caspian poster. Thanks to cinematical. Return of the King, anyone? I really hope they don’t screw this one up. It looks pretty freakin sweet, though.

“I’d like to play a game.” – Jigsaw, “Saw II”

Posted in Uncategorized on September 18, 2007 by Brandon

Well, here’s a new little tid bit of trailer that looks fairly interesting. Let’s hope this very interesting premise doesn’t devolve into some typical mindless shlock like Hollywood is known for.

Sorry I haven’t been posting a lot lately. I’ve been busy as school approaches. But I will do my best to continually report on rumors and such. I think once I get some videos up on youtube I will be back in the game and my site will be reinvigorated. Let’s hope so.

And in light of my resolution to continually bring you rumors, check this out. Scroll down to view the news item. Yup, the sqeuaky clean High School Musical star has yet again had more photos of herself nude released on the web. Geez my knees, Vanessa. How many pictures did you take?

Oh, and Whoopi Goldberg has been added to the View. Yummy.

Shoot ‘Em Up (7/10); Overdue Rumors and News

Posted in Movie Reviews on September 13, 2007 by Brandon

So I thought I’d do a double whammy – post my Shoot ‘Em Up review in one post while also going through a news item I missed since I last posted.

Shoot ‘Em Up (7/10)

Let me describe my return to the multiplex after a month and a half hiatus like this: in the first few minute the main character kills a man by shoving a carrot through his mouth and out the back of his skull. Yes, it’s THAT kind of movie. Shoot ‘Em Up is this year’s Snakes on a Plane, only better. A grotesque film that blatantly obviously panders to every single secret desire moviegoers have deep down inside: to see some blood fly, and screw all that plot and character development. Shoot ‘Em Up has absolutely zero value as a character study, a love story, or even a really very interesting good guy bad guy relationship. It seems that phrase, “over-the-top” was almost tailor made to fit this film. With a title like “Shoot ‘Em Up”, one would guess that it doesn’t leave much to the imagination, and in this case, that’s a good thing.

The film begins with the main character sitting on a bench munching a carrot. A pregnant woman stumbles by, followed by a stalker with a gun. Rolling his eyes, the perfectly chosen Clive Owen mumbles, “F***,” and heads off to save the woman. Minutes later the said carrot is implanted in the baddie’s skull as Owen (Mr. Smith) rushes forward to try to catch up to the next action scene, carrying the successfully delivered baby in tow, which he takes to the only woman he believes can help him take care of it – DQ, the prostitute with the heart of gold, unimpressively played by the otherwise talented Monica Belucci, whose best moment in the film occurs while having sex with Clive Owen in the midst of a gun battle. Yes, it’s THAT kind of film.

Shoot ‘Em Up purports to be some kind of high-minded satire, a play on American’s need and want to see blood spatter and bullets fly, but don’t be fooled. Shoot ‘Em Up is much more of an homage than a parody, never really once making fun of the violence, but always glorifying it, with each hilariously jaw-dropping scene outdoing the one before it. Shoot ‘Em Up won’t have you laughing AT the violence, it will have you cheering for more. And though there are plenty of very creatively done moments of violence, it never goes as far as it could have – the film never quite reaches the zenith attained by its first carrot-in-the-head stunt. Sure, it’s exhilarating, and you’ll be laughing your head off every couple of minutes, but it’s never quite the same. And besides, satire/parody is always walking a very fine line, and Shoot ‘Em Up never keeps that line. If, to qualify as a satire, all you had to do would be to make the exact same kind of action drivel made in every other movie. Sure, the action is more creative than usual in Shoot ‘Em Up, but it’s not any more a parody than Live Free or Die Hard. These days, every action movie is a parody of the genre, so something else must be done to raise itself above the norm, and Shoot ‘Em Up does nothing to claim it’s a better satire than all the rest.

Aside from Monica Belucci, the other two main characters, Clive Owen and Paul Giamatti, do their work remarkably well. Giamatti seems to have taken lessons from every ridiculously over-the-top-but-still-fun

villain in movie history, relishing every single line he’s given with oomph and gusto. Clive Owen plays Mr. Smith like the bastard child of John McClane and James Bond, a wise-talking, cynical motherf***er who doesn’t take crap from anybody, but will still stop to save a baby and have sex with its erstwhile mother. Yup, it’s THAT kind of movie.

Normally my reviews are a lot longer than this, but there ain’t much to analyze here, folks. A bunch of people run around with guns and get killed the ridiculously talented main character who happens to be protecting a baby. If you think there’s much more to Shoot ‘Em Up than that, you probably shouldn’t go to see it anyway

The Passing of a Grand Master

If I ever have one hundredth influence that she had as an author, I will die a happy man. Madeleine L’Engle, the great fantasy author of A Wrinkle in Time and A Wind in the Door, died at age 88. I hadn’t read much of her work, just Many Waters, A Swiftly Tilting Planet, and the previous two mentioned. All enthralled me from beginning to end. Her influence on my as a person and as a writer will last.

I’ll post more rumors later or tomorrow. Bye all.